I’ve been doing a lot of visiting this week. Can’t tell why, but it’s becoming more enjoyable than it use to be. I plan to have a date (an arranged meeting with some Christian brothers) tomorrow about our relationships. Tonight, I had meal with a guy with whom I discussed a part of my relationship life—I mean the romantic side, not that part which deals with relational get-togethers among fellow believers; and most of what you’ll read here’s a part of what we talked about.
Some teens find it so easy to get into romantic relationships without really cross-checking what they are desiring to learn, handle and even rarely do some draw lines where none of them should cross. Now, it’s funny! When I was completing Secondary School (Grade 9), I loved a girl back then (I still do), but I had no idea what relationships were all about; what we’re really looking for as teens; emotions, habits and expressions, to avoid. I had friends who actually were hoppers when it had to do with ladies. Back then, I thought it was like anything. I’m 20 now, and I’ve not really said, I Love You to her yet, and I’m sure you already know why. When I was back at school, that’s about 6 years ago, I had no proper education on this kind of relationship, but it’s 6 years later, and I’m thankful I have the knowledge on relationship which I do practice intentionally.
But believe it or not, you must talk about it! Parents must talk about it with their children, sometimes in conversations where they find it helpful to get an insight on life’s difficulties and the joy that comes from soaring safely through such moments, and that involves relationship as well, where you find betrayal, hurt and regret. Believe me, we have to create moments to talk about these things. I was never taught what it’s like to have a relationship with a lady—to me, I grew up with the impression that ladies are devils, seductive organisms not worth knowing.
What if we open up to them that the “sweet” feeling they have inside of them towards the opposite sex is not the result of they being originally corrupt but some sign that they are really growing; and with that learn to manage those feelings without doing something they might regret later on. It’s enjoyable to love someone, and the problem is always seeing them with someone else, so we always think the result is just spilling it out to them. It’s sure not, but it’s good to! Although, there are times we have to, for how can he/she know the feeling of they were never told? It does involve the right person. If he/she is the kind that may reason with you and either give you an “I do too” or, “I’m sorry, I’ve got someone else” (now, I hate that!) without yelling at you, you’ll be really lucky. However, it’s good to discuss it with someone who has experience before you take a step.
We’ll do well to teach our kids that those who hop from one lady to another or guy to another, non-stop, would actually find it hard to enjoy their marriages—they would always stretch their eyes towards someone else or someone else’s man or woman. Life involves them in whatever we teach, so when they meet such things in life, they wouldn’t want to ruin everything to get something that wouldn’t last. From being teens who can spend years with their ladies or guys, learning to soar through life together, it does, and always, leads to marriage: A happy one. This is possible where two folks come together to work and bless each other both spiritually and physically, not based on how cute, handsome, beautiful he or she looks, nor how sweet he/she talks, but the inner beauty.
I pray someday, we’ll open our eyes to groom our kids to see that they can grow up to enjoy a blessed romantic life where both honor and bless each other, listening to each other, not because it all began on The Wedding Day, but it all started the very day those two young kids began loving and helping each other live through life’s difficulties. You, parents, will enjoy it at the end! I bet that!